How Evil IS self?

Welcome to another wonderful edition of Quiz Time on Tuesdays!

Today, explore the question:  How evil is self?  Shall see...

You've broken the law- Yes, am always off leash in places that should not be!  Civil disobedience.
You've looked at nudie pics online- Sometimes, look at pictures of Xoloitzcuintli and Chinese Crested.  For the laughs.  Do not see why is evil!
You've secretly wished someone harm- All the love and love and love for all the people!
You've kissed someone you shouldn't be kissing- All people are good for to kiss!
You've said something so mean it made someone cry- Crying is most sad!  Only say nice things and love all the people!
You've done illegal drugs- Does getting high from whacking self in head count?
You've killed a bug- Flies and spiders are so nom.
You've spit in someone's drink- Not on purpose!  Is difficult to not slobber all over the place in the water bowl.  Sorry Cookie.
You've sought revenge on someone- Nothing has happened to that needed to send revenge for!
You've made a prank phone call- Do not use phone!
You've turned people against someone- No no, all the people have to be together!
You've illegally downloaded music online- Am not much one for music, self.
You've flirted with someone to make someone else jealous- Making others jealous is not a thing to do!
You've told racist or sexist jokes- Hehe, do know pretty good one...
You've called someone the "c" word- Which word?  Cute?  Cuddly?  Cookie?  Guess so.
You've made a promise you knew you were going to break- Cattle Dogs always keep promises.
You've done the "walk of shame"- The most shameful walk is coming downstairs after being yelled at for eating trash.
You've corrupted a minor- Am role model for small puppies!
You've divulged someone's dark secret- Your secrets are safe with self!
You've made fun of a mentally disabled person- Would not be most rude! *Sidekick note:  I distinctly remember you saying in puppy kindergarten that the other puppies had small brains* Oh, am most ashamed... (but still think, was true!)
You've cheated on a test or lover- Cheating is wrong!  Tests and love must tell the most truth!
You don't believe in God- Does not compute?  Who is God?  *Sidekick note: Technically, even super-intelligent Cattle Dogs don't have the capacity for belief in God*
You hate kids- Oh no!  Human puppies most best!
You've gotten in a fist tooth fight- But only, was attacked first!
You made someone's life horrible in school- No, mostly keep to self.
You've shoplifted, or stolen from someone- Often steal chew bones and food from Cookie.  Am the least ashamed!  Food most delicious.
You've been so drunk you couldn't remember the night before- How does that happen?  So much water that cannot remember?  Am most confused.
You've vandalized someone's car or house- Does leg lifting count?
You've made fun of a fat person- All size people give as much love.
You have a fondness for disturbing pictures- Do not even know, what are trying to ask, quiz.  All pictures like frisbee puppies and pretty flowers!  Least of the disturb!
You've blamed a fart on someone else- Not worth it.  Is just fault of sidekick though, for feeding the wrong food.  Fish does not comply with tummy.
You enjoy setting things on fire- Other day, walked to close to fire in fireplace.  Was first time had seen up close!  Was warm and singey and would not like for it to happen again.
You've been arrested- Have been put in time out, if that counts?
You've secretly backstabbed a friend- Would so never!  Backstabbers lowest of low.
You would choose your life over the lives of 100,000 strangers- Would stay alive despite 100,000 dogs dying, but if could save people, then would die a million times.
You would kill for 1,000,000 dollars if you would not get caught- Have said before, will say again, is silly for dog to have so much money.  Just need rawhide and toys and food and love, and am happy boy.
You've harmed yourself to get attention- To get attention, will only stare and stare and stare.  And sometimes climb on heads of people.
You have a nemesis- YES!  Many dog nemeses in Townsville.
You believe in an eye for an eye, or even more- You attack self, you will regret.
You don't think lying to a stranger is a big deal- Will always lie on ground to stranger!  No big deal!  Perhaps will give belly rubs!
You think giving to the homeless is wasting money- All the homeless dogs and cats in shelters, they need money and love!
You would pick evil over stupid any day- Why?
You aren't bothered by seeing others in pain- Oh no, is most worst when others are hurt.
You'd rather have world domination than world peace- Am not alpha leader material.  Am most happy to be peaceful in pack.
You enjoy very violent video games- Video games in general, are silly.
You are disgusted by weak people- No, weak is comfortable because weak will not attack self!
You would keep a wallet full of cash if it came your way- Wallet must go to police!  Then police will say, "Goooooood dog!  What a good boy!  Who is a clever puppy?  You are a clever puppy!  Oh yeah!  Oh yeah!"  Will be most best.
You would rather harm an enemy than help a friend- Friends are for to help!
You've shot a gun and liked it- The taste of its cherry chapstick?
You'd rather be a supervillian than a superhero- Would never trade being a superhero for anything!


Results:
You are 28% Evil.
A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well.  In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil.

Most interesting!  *Chomps teeth with the most menace*