Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Have been venomated!

Life on the island has been busy. So many people around. Little boy who runs around like a crazy, and has very nice toys. Love his toys. Play with his toys all the time. Nice Toy Boy leaves bedroom door open and toys on floor just for! Nice Toy Boy's parents also neat. Good to play with. Very friendly but can not jump on them. They don't play when jump on.

Can get Jacinta to feed me just by staring at her while walk! So easy! But evil cars. The evil cars. The evil cars scare so much. Near road, no space to stay away from cars. Zoom by SO fast. Scary. Hide. Jacinta feed while cars go by but too scared. Only more scared because so much noise. If stand on side away from cars it is not so scary but still a little scary. But when no cars, walks very nice. Then so tired. Today, was so tired could not move. Just collapse.

Scary dogs across road. First one come and poop in yard. Jacinta spray smelly chemical all over, say "to keep safe, because don't know if healthy." Then today while taking walk both come and yap yap yap at. Jacinta picked up. She was scared, think. They bark lot. Sound mean. She yell, "Can you get your dogs, please?" Then lady come out and say sorry and say is irresponsible and sorry. Think, most of all irresponsible because of evil cars. Yesterday evil car almost hit her dog. Hopefully she keep dogs in.

Toy called Kong sometimes has food. Is good food but is frustrating. Bark at to say, "Give food!!!!!" Ate lots of other yummies. Ate raw zucchini, ate watermelon. Ate lamb and sausage and ham and cheese. Eat lots of crumbs!

Also more teaching Jacinta to feed. She get so dumb, have to do incredible things for her to notice. Must walk backwards, or sit on hind legs. Only then does she see and click and feed.

Today was pretty bad day though. Had to go to vet lady. Was nice- at first. But then injected with venom! Venom I tell you! Stung so much. Had to cry and cry. Still stings in back. Not want to be touched on back right now. Snapped at Jacinta when tried to pet or pick up. Am so sore. Want to feel better. Will sleep venom off. Am super-dog.

Tomorrow, will pounce on Jacinta until takes pictures. Will have pictures next time.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Boats are fun then not so fun

Have went to "Maggie Island" now. First, got on big boat. Was AWESOME. Was wind in face, and very nice. But then, started to feel tummy sick. Cuddled with Jacinta to feel better. Why feel so tummy sick? Was having so much fun! But no. Had to be tummy sick. Then was sick all over Jacinta. Felt so sick! Was very happy to get off big boat.

After bad boat, went to new house. House has evil invisible walls. Keep running into them. Hurts my nose. Is good house though. Shower smells so awesome. Have to lick and lick and lick the floor of. Jacinta not happy with. Also nice yard. Kind of not much space but goes up into mountain. Lots of things to smell. Also, pool! Jumped in and swam. Did not know could swim but can. Then was wet. Rolled in dirt to dry self.

Later, all got in car and went to beach! Was beach where could go on sand and in water. Dug lots in sand. Chased boy puppy and bit his ankles, like good cattle dog. Boy puppy not happy with. Then chased water and bit white foam. Was salty. Sometimes white foam catch. Got wet.

Also played with many nice people. All say am so adorable. A few say am vicious. They know my secret identity. How they know?

What else. Went to other beach but only on grass. Practiced training Jacinta. Would lie down, she would click. Some people liked to watch. Much nicer people than mean nasty "When is 6 months old, can take him to Canine Obedience Club of Townsville" man. Grrrrrr.

Found out, Jacinta will feed if stay in crate alone! She walk away, stay in crate, she clicks. Sometimes get nervous and follow her but she just stops, then stare at her and go back to crate. Am so clever. She feeds me then.

This morning, took walk. Was fed for walking nicely and looking at Jacinta. Was also fed when cars go by. Maybe think maybe like cars. Maybe. Was good walk though and good breakfast. Got back inside and played with Kangaroo and Rope. Then took big nap. Wonder what else will do today!

Oh and silly Jacinta has no battery in camera. Silly silly Jacinta. Am hoping charger is in fun rolling box with clothes and things. But for now, no pictures.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Super Heroes DO NOT sleep with teddies.

So much has happened last few days. Is so crazy! Learned the Chauffeur/sidekick's name is Jacinta. Suppose will refer to her as such in future.
Family of Jacinta come into town. Love boy human puppy. He so cuddly and love. Girl human puppy also love and cuddly. Older girl and parents also cuddle and love. Also met many other members of family. Too many to list but was all so fun.

Was scary girl at park though, who tried to grab head. Jacinta told her off. Said, is too scary.

Girl who came to get from airport has come over a few days to watch the boring screen with Jacinta. Like to type on boring screen but girl who came to get from airport and Jacinta watch show that goes something like "Dunnn, DUNN dunnn. Doo dooo doo! Doo doo doo!" Is hard to say. Sounds boring but get cuddles while watch.
Today very awesome. Went to beach. Not get to play in water or sand, but was fun. Lots of people. Girl who came to get me from airport had birthday party with fun friends. Also, got to meet a young child who was polite and not grab on head. Petted on side, and Jacinta fed. Nasty people say when walk past with their dogs and Jacinta was feeding, say, "When is 6 months old, can take him to Canine Obedience Club of Townsville." Like she not know what is doing. Nasty uneducated people. Think is an idiot. Grrr. Want to growl at.
At beach- pretty awesome!

Have decided to be quiet in car. As long as can sit in front seat, will be hush.
Also today, got toenails clipped on front paws. Got lots of treats! And also, got new nametag. Very handsome, Jacinta say. Says am Vertigo. Nobody will think am Mister Squiggles!The Awesome new nametag. Feel so grown-up.

Was very sleepy after all of this. But this photo, all set up, really! Superheroes do not sleep with teddies. *Chews Kanga*

Saturday, June 19, 2010

Is a long hard day to be a puppy.

Yesterday, met good lady! She wanted to take home with her. She was so cuddly! Call her Cuddly Lady. Want to go home with her and cuddle all day.

Cuddly Lady plays with!

Also yesterday, chauffeur/sidekick took to place called "You-knee." Said, had to pick up a paper. Seemed pleasantly surprised at getting a "D" on one. Many people said was adorable!! Secret identity is obviously well hidden. One man said was a "fierce beast." He knows who am!
Must act more cute. When went to you-knee, chauffeur/sidekick let sit on backseat. But want to sit in front seat! Cried and cried about it. Screamed even. She will learn.

Also yesterday, protected neighbourhood from evil cars. Took sidekick/chauffeur to corner of street and got her to feed for to looking at her eyes. Very clever to make her do that! When look at her eyes, she give soft squishy meat. This also make cars not be mean. Cars just drive by if look at eyes. Not scary. Only, sometimes scary. Sometimes very loud and must walk on right side of c/s not left even though have her trained to feed on left. Cars sometimes too scary for food. Also big dogs scary. When get big, will show them thing or two. Will scare them, see how they like.

Remember how no toilet in super secret awesome lair? Well, thought toilet in kitchen and toilet on rug and toilet in utility room. But guess not. C/s come before get to pee, and tell "Uh oh, outside!" and pick up or clap. A little scary actually. But then run to door and go outside. Toilet there. Then c/s very happy and she play a bit with. Don't know how to tell her time to go outside. But if she take outside, I know to toilet. Must find way to communicate when need to go. Also guess what? Trained c/s to take outside in morning when yip. She very fast learner!

Much other things happen, today. Am getting comfortable with house. Now know that water is in super secret awesome lair and can go there if want drink. Run down hallway like crazy dog. Fun! Also fun to jump on side table. But c/s keeps taking off of. Is good to chase rope toy, then carry off where c/s can not see, and chew it. But now she follows! Want to be alone, you. Want to go into utility room to chew. Why follow?

Sock housemate wore socks today! Played with her socks. Was best thing ever!
Scared housemate petted today! Was best thing ever!
Girl Scared housemate played with kangaroo with. Was best thing ever!

Went on long walk. Was tiresome. Had c/s carry for some. Went to place that smelled like other dogs and something ick. Was frightened at first. Were 2 cats there. One big and one just a baby. Liked the baby but baby hissed at. Then barked at. Then baby hissed at again. Was nice lady who petted. Was also funny table thing, stood on. Numbers said 4.2 or 4.6 or something like that. Is how much weigh. Am big. Then 2 white dogs. Not like so much but sniffed one. But c/s said, "Is not vaccinated" whatever that means so white dog taken away. Mean man yelled at nice boy for letting dog near. Am sad for nice boy. Don't like to be yelled at. And liked to sniff white dog. Was not so scary once met.

Also went on other car ride. Climbed in front. Success! C/s has fun dog toy hanging from car ceiling but would not let play with. Was quiet once in front. Heard c/s mention something about a car harness. Took car to house with nice dog, c/s say name Axel. He so happy to see, and very interested to meet. C/s pick up and say, can't meet Axel. Axel very friendly though. Meet a man who gives chicken and other tasties! Sit very nicely for him. Tasty food man. Want to live with him. Lady cuddles so well. Not Cuddly Lady, but other lady who cuddles. Love cuddles. Want to live with her. Other lady who cuddles is awesome. Also human puppy. Like human puppy because he play. Can jump on him and chew!

*Yawn* Am very sleepy. But other happened today. Was long day.
Taught c/s to feed when lying down! Am very clever to think of. But now won't always feed when sit. Makes funny noise and only when she makes funny mouth noise and sit, will click noise and treat come. She is dumb sometimes. But also taught to feed when touch hand with nose, and when she holds paw and puts funny metal thing to paw. To above is making c/s feed! So clever!

Yuck! Yuckiest thing today! Smelly cream! C/s put smelly cream on her. Does she think smells GOOD?! Smells awful. Must rub face and body on carpet for 5 minutes then hide from smell under bed. Then rub face and body on grass outside. Will not sleep in room tonight thank you, where is smelly. Will sleep in bathroom. Am brave enough.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Day 2 has started off on the wrong paw.

In the night, was sitting in kitchen with chauffeur/sidekick when housemate came out. Was scared that it might be a mean person sneaking in so barked at him. He was scared. Chauffeur/sidekick yelled at. That was mean. Was SCARED! She said was a "bad dog." No! She said sorry later, and that she felt she had to, for sake of housemate. But she was wrong to do that. Was just scared.
On plus, c/s decided she needed to keep her safe, so am allowed in kitchen. Knew she would see that was right.

Have realized made big mistake when buying secret lair. Is no toilet! Realized this morning and really needed to pee. Tried to tell the chauffeur/sidekick, but she is a little bit dense. When tried to tell her with high pitched yelps she said "When are quiet, can come out." Tried to tell her nicely but had to show her how much needed to pee. Hated having to pee in lair but she got the message. Maybe she will build toilet in super awesome secret lair. Although am superdog on a mission, still have physiology of 8 week old puppy, which means small bladder. The chauffeur/sidekick must remember this in the future.

Where did agent find this chauffeur/sidekick? In the internet classifieds or something?! Might fire her. She is one rude cookie when she is tired. Her fault for staying up way too late last night reading blogs, and keeping up late with her giggles. In this morning, chewed on her sweater and she grabbed face. Was too mean of her. Can't believe she did it. It is not the way to treat a super dog. Well, is only human and not a super dog. Can not expect loads of awesomeness from her.

She promised get to meet her friends today. Tomorrow get to meet some of her family. Hopefully none of them are rude and grab face.

Also, was teaching c/s a new cue for food. Just walk into lair. Then BAM, fun click noise and piece of kibble. Is easy. Then she get stupid, and not feed unless sitting. Then, she not pay attention unless make put nose on floor of lair. Where is she going with this?

Will post some pictures of when meet awesome friends.

Mister Squiggles by Night!!

Day one of undercover mission.

Must work on training the chauffeur/sidekick not to call Mister Squiggles in front of general populus. To that aim, am attempting to bite her toes whenever she uses secret title. Must use Vertigo.

Chauffeur/sidekick has suggested wear a collar to keep secret identity, well, secret. Nobody can recognize with black collar on! Feel like Peter Parker. Am itchy though. Can see collar on left.

Being a superhero is hard work! Today, kept yard safe from large leaves. Patrolled neighbourhood and began working on public relations. People think am just a cute puppy. They don't know.

Have been teaching chauffeur/sidekick when to feed. She has a fun noise toy and just need to get her to click it for her to feed. Was easy. Figured out just to sit. Then followed her around asking her to feed. She lost interest in the game and put fun noise toy away. Was still hungry. Learned how to ask c/s for bone to chew. Just have to play with shoes.

Allowed c/s to sleep with last night. She didn't know would let her sleep with, so had to tell her by whining, then she let up on the bed. Just for the night. Know she was nervous about having a superdog in the house. Tonight will sleep alone in lair, as prefer. Already showed her how to sleep by herself, when took a nap earlier today. She didn't take me out of lair, just left to chew bone. Progress. Need plenty of sleep. Superdog work is difficult. Picture of secret-super-awesome lair to right.

Chewed on plant, felt cool on gums. c/s told to "stop, what if it's poisonous?" Kept chewing. Am a superdog. Poison does not affect. Win.

Saw strange thing in living room. Is funny dog living in wall. Tried to get it out, barked at it to 'come with!' and tried to dig a hole to get it out. Could not get it. Will have to leave it in there.
Also, a crazy thing, a stick with straw, came and tried to eat crumbs from bone. Was angry. Those were crumbs from bone for to eat. But crazy thing ate them. Tried to bite crazy thing but it jumped in the air when came over. Eventually went and laid down and watched it. Am still angry.

Practiced calisthenics in the afternoon. Must keep in tip-top shape. Caught tail, which is an important skill. Was pleased. Practiced army rolls for dodging bullets. Also worked with rope to build neck strength. Will come in handy when have to pull c/s to a mission when am on leash and collar. But for now, will walk nicely on leash. Wanted to go teach yap-dog a thing or two but c/s was right: "must not blow cover."

C/s is attempting to control a few very annoying things. First, she will not let in kitchen. This is very bad of her because she needs constant protection. Must stay within 6 feet of her at all times. Second, she is trying to make ride in back of car. Am superhero, you know? Is wrong to make ride in back. Tried to tell her so, want to ride in front seat. She will have none of it. At least on the back seat instead of in way back? She says no. Will hopefully convince her soon.

Dreamed many times today about family. Dreamed of mum feeding, and dreamed of chasing with siblings. Think tail wagged lots. But am grown up dog now, with job to do. Must leave past in past and focus on the mission ahead.